Why is it that some people seem to have an overwhelming need to invade your body space? No matter how much room there is, they just have to crowd you – nudging you as they talk to you, breathing their coffee and fag breath all over you and slowly pushing you backwards until you’re pinned to the nearest wall.
I don’t just mean lecherous old men either – in fact lecherous old men are usually so blatant you can almost (not quite) forgive them. Real body space invaders come in all shapes and sizes and they don’t discriminate in their common desire to simply get right in your face. I’m undecided about whether this is some kind of control thing or whether they are seriously just so oblivious that they can’t feel themselves nudging you, can’t tell that during the course of your conversation you’ve reversed so far that you’re nearly falling down the stairs and can’t see the look of disgust on your face as they fill it with the sour waft of last night’s dinner.
Serial space invaders include Chris Evans (check him out on the One show – Alex whatshername spends most of it doubled backwards as he practically pins her to the sofa), most drunk men over the age of 40, that “friend” you can’t shake off, who glues him/herself so close to you they clip your ankles with every step you take, people who spread their limbs as wide as possible on public transport and anyone who feels the need to share the details of their sad existence with all and sundry by talking too loudly on their mobile phone.
Thankfully most of us understand the unwritten rules of human behaviour. We respect the invisible body boundary and understand that it should be breached only by invitation. Sadly there will always be some who don’t, and these I consign to Room 101 with a nose full of garlic breath and a shower of spittle for company.